Dads, the Big Day is almost here - Mother's Day. Do you have your game ready? Is Mom (i.e., the mother of your children) going to be happy this year? I chatted with some fellow Moms recently and asked them to share what they wish Dad knew about celebrating Mother's Day properly. Below are the answers. (And no, I will not be ratting out who said what.) Dads, take heed or feel the wrath.
10. Please give Mom some Alone Time. She'd like to shower in peace. She wants to get dressed without explaining how a bra works. Putting on makeup shouldn't involve playing referee with the lipstick.
9. One friend answered, "Thank God it's not football season!" Holy cow. What a thought. But the sentiment brings up a good point. Dads, put the phones away. Turn off the TV. Pay attention to your wife and kids.
8. Your mother is not your wife's mother. If you are lucky to still have Grandma in the picture, that's wonderful, but don't expect your wife to create a big hurrah for her. In fact, don't expect her to be part of that celebration at all. Pack up the kids and take them to visit Grandma...without Mom. You'll fulfill this rule and rule #10 all in one pop, and your wife will be very grateful. Remember, Father's Day is just a month away...
7. You are in charge of the kids for the day. Mom wants to put in an appearance, be adored, flooded with gifts and adorable handmade cards, and treated to a lavish meal. And then, when it's all over, she'd like to drift away to a nice book or meet up with friends, only to return when the kids are nicely tucked in bed. Well, that's what I'd like at least. Brian, are you reading?
6. It may be time to consider establishing Mother's Day Actual and Mother's Day Observed. Mother's Day Actual would be celebrated on the official day and could include anyone that you feel should be a part of the celebration - mother-in-laws, aunts, close family friends, etc. Mom would put a big smile on her face and give everyone a lovely day knowing that on a date not far in the future she will be enjoying Mother's Day Observed. Mother's Day Observed would be when Mom would actually get a day of relaxation and pampering, and all the rules here would apply.
5. DIVORCED DADS - this one's for you. Most likely, your ex-wife is still the primary caretaker for your kids. That means the onus is still on you to make sure your kids have at least something to give their mom. Man up. It's the right thing to do and it'll make you feel good. Plus, as noted above, Father's Day is just a month away and she might just pay it forward.
4. Tell Mom how beautiful she is. You really can't say this enough, and the payoff could be huge. I'll leave it at that. Tip: you might want to remember this one on Father's Day.
3. Don't leave a mess for tomorrow. Yes, you played with the kids all day, made sure they had gifts for Mom, and even took care of meals. That's great, but all your hard work will go down the drain if you leave Mom with an unholy mess to clean up. At the very least make sure the dishes are done and the kitchen isn't a disaster.
2. Yes, you need to get Mom a gift. The kids' gifts are wonderful and your wife will treasure them always, but let's not forget that she is also an enormous part of making sure your living legacies (i.e., children) are presentable and speaking in full sentences. You can hold your head high whenever you're in public with your children because of this lovely lady. Get her something nice.
1. One of my friends was feeling very sentimental this week, and offered up the following: "We couldn't do this without you. Well, we could, actually - but we wouldn't want to!" So true.
Happy Mother's Day!
