Defining yourself through home

Some people are as married to their homes as they are to the people with whom they share their homes. Our homes, defined by the way we keep them, the improvements we make to them and the order or disorder within them imbue us with a sense of ourselves that we can rarely find elsewhere.

We often have specific ideas about what a house will do for us in terms of defining a particular lifestyle. For instance, how often have you come across the following: “Tuscan inspired kitchen”, or “…for those who love to entertain”. Marketing is powerful because people let the messages in. They believe them primarily because they want to associate themselves with the marketing message, whatever it may be.

Another way in which people define house and home is through their historical connections and perspective. Perhaps they were satisfied with the modest home of their youth. They might then seek out a house in a style similar to what they had before because it is familiar, comfortable and mirrors their perceived sense of status. Or maybe they were dissatisfied with their childhood home, and long for something bigger, or with more land, more windows or more bedrooms. 

It is typical when working with people in a home-buying stage of life to notice certain habits or tendencies. Many people, for instance, work off of wish lists. Sometimes, the items people wish for are negotiable, but other times they are not. People have strong emotional connections to the things they desire. The problem is that often people have never taken the time to understand why they want certain things. What do they hope these things will do for them?

I think is it is wise for homebuyers to have a good, basic idea of what they want in their next home. However, things like number of bedrooms and bathroom aside, wish lists can be extremely limiting. Homebuyers that are open to a home’s potential often have the best results, and the greatest satisfaction. 

A friend of mine saw a home that had so much going for it. It had nearly 3000 square feet, over an acre of land, a huge combination laundry room and mudroom, 5 bedrooms, in-ground pool, a dedicated office, and quality construction including hardwood floors throughout. To her, this house was it. To her husband, the house was all wrong, mostly because it shared some physical aspects with his childhood home (which he wasn’t fond of). My friend and her husband didn't wait long before buying the house. In relatively short order, they have done away with the physical things that bothered them in the first place and love their home. 

My message to homebuyers, put your list aside and let your heart decide.

If you happen to be near Parmelee Hill Rd. in Durham, you probably won’t think twice when driving past this extra special contemporary home on the corner of Ernest Dr.  But this house imbues a feeling that cannot be described.

Built in 1981, this inspired 4 bedroom contemporary gives equal importance to proportion and style with 2542 square feet. Poised on a spacious 1+ acre corner lot, this home offers quality post & beam construction with fine interior details, large rooms and a spectacular open floor plan.

This home is superior when it comes to melding function with flair and is exemplified in the great number of windows for light filled spaces and passive solar heat.

In addition to the perfectly pristine master, there are 3 additional bedrooms, 2 full baths, elegant dining room, and open living room and family room. Built to impress with stone staircase & fireplace (in fact, there are 3 fireplaces!), exposed beams & vaulted ceilings, there is quality in every direction with wide-plank hardwood floors and slate entry foyer.

The giant chef's kitchen keeps every ingredient & gadget at hand with incredible counter runs, ergonomic drawer pulls, plentiful cabinets & customized Subzero fridge. Your family will gather close to stay warm next to the Vigilant woodstove while you enjoy the glorious island cooktop, long peninsula with counter seating, granite, butcher block & home organization hub.

And if you work from home or have a need for studio space, this home also features bonus space conveniently located on the first floor. It has a private stepped entrance and a fireplace making it an ideal working office or studio. This fine home also includes two ground-level decks, full basement and a 2-car garage.

If the walls of this home could talk, they would make great conversation.